I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
