was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Randomize
