Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
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