Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
FUCK WHALES
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