I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
Just sold all of my pants in order to buy tonight's whiskey. Goodbye, high functioning alcoholism. Hello, Dad.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Randomize
