these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
Ever since I got married, I've become the MacGuyver of masturbation
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
We had sex on a dog bed..
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize
