I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
Randomize
