the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
