at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
