i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
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