I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
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