I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
