You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize