And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
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