Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
