is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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