I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
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