Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
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