No awkward lesbian experiences without me
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
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