Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize