OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
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