toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
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