Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
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