We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Randomize
