Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
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