Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Randomize
