Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
He told me they were just razor bumps!
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
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