i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize
