If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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