Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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