I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Randomize
