You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
