there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
Randomize
