ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Randomize