**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
