btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
Randomize
