I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
Randomize
