I look better un-naked...
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Randomize
