Hey man sorry I got all grabby
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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