Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize