i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
