Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize
