I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
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