Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize