So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
Randomize
