let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
Randomize
