You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Randomize
