plz talk dirty to me
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
i would one night stand the shit outta him
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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