I skipped work to stalk him.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
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