i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
Randomize
